Memorandum
From Your Child
- Don't
spoil me. I know quite well that I ought not to have all
I ask for. I'm only testing you.
- Don't
be afraid to be firm with me. I prefer it. It lets me know
where I stand.
- Don't
use force with me. It teaches me that power is all that
counts. I will respond more readily to being led.
- Don't
be inconsistent. That confuses me and makes me try harder
to getaway with everything I can.
- Don't
make promises; you may not be able to keep them. That will
discourage my trust in you. Don't be too upset when I say
"I hate you". I don't mean it, but I want you to feel sorry
for what you have done to me.
- Don't
make me feel smaller than I am. I will make up for it by
behaving like a "big shot". Don't do things for me that
I can do for myself. It makes me feel like a baby, and I
may continue to put you in my service.
- Don't
let my "bad habits" get me a lot of your attention. It only
encourages me to continue them.
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- Don't correct
me in front of people. I'll take much more notice if you talk
quietly with me in private.
- Don't try
to discuss my behavior in the heat of a conflict. For some reason
my hearing is not very good at this time and my cooperation is
even worse. It is all right to take the action required, but let's
not talk about it until later.
- Don't try
to preach to me. You'd be surprised how well I know that's right
and wrong. Don't make me feel that my mistakes are sins. I have
to learn to make mistakes without feeling that I am no good.
- Don't nag.
If you do, I shall have to protect myself by appearing deaf.
- Don't demand
explanations for my wrong behavior. I really don't know why I
did it.
- Don't tax
my honesty too much. I am easily frightened into telling lies.
- Don't protect
me from consequences. I need to learn from experience.
- Don't take
too much notice of my small ailments. I may learn to enjoy poor
health if it get me much attention.
- Don't answer
"SILLY" or meaningless questions. I just want you to keep busy
with me.
Don't ever suggest that you are perfect or infallible. It gives
me too much to live up to.
- Don't worry
about the little amount of time we spend together. It is HOW we
spend it that counts.
- Don't let
my fears arouse your anxiety. Then I will become more afraid.
Show me courage.
- Don't forget
that I can't thrive without lots of understanding and encouragement,
but I don't need to tell you that, do I?
REMEMBER
THAT I LEARN MORE FROM A MODEL THAN A CRITIC!!!
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